Thrash Hits

February 10th, 2011

What happens on Warped Tour… makes a baby? PLUS! Emo n00dz :(

emo baby sponsored by vans warped tour 2010 thrash hits

Frankie Palmeri of Emmure and Jesse Johnson – also of Emmure (ooh, band tension) – are the emo peppercorns in the online rumour mill at the moment. They’re the names being touted around as both having impregnated alt.model Shay Ryan with their emo jizz on last summer’s Warped Tour. Ooh err.

***WARNING!!***
There are very nearly naked men below.
Some things can not be un-seen.

This rumour has mainly been put out there by LOLsome blog Is Anyone Up – a website which posts gallery upon gallery of nudie photos that emos have taken of themselves and have either sent to their special loves or have sent them to the website in a bid for nakey glory. Fun.

THIS WOULD NEVER HAPPEN IN LARS’ DAY. Can you really see Kerry King sending photos of his knob to his beloved? Go on. Imagine it.

Apparently, something that a lot of guys in emo bands do is take photos of their winkies and send them to girls with loads of tattoos who reciprocate by sending photos of their boobs and fannies back. This is a very, very modern courtship.

We disagree wholeheartedly with exploiting women in exchange for cheap hits on our shitty website but we’ll (kind of) make an exception this one time because it’s some photos of willies! Emo willies at that. Hooray!

Here is a photo gallery of willies that belong to famous men. Hopefully, you’ll never go see these bands again after this.

Ryan Ross (formerly) of Panic! At The Disco

Picture 1 of 4

He's actually having a wank. Dirty boy.

Sorry if this ruined your day but to temper the horror, here are links to the girl from VersaEmerge showing off her bum and sideboob and the latest keyboardist from Winds Of Plague showing off her bum. Great.

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