Thrash Hits

May 11th, 2011

Album: Winds of Plague – Against the World

Winds of Plague promo photo Thrash Hits

Winds of Plague
Against the World
Century Media
18 April 2011

by Tom Gibbons

I’d like to give Jonathan “Johnny Plague” Cooke a big cuddle and thank him for overseeing another let-off by his deathcore gangsta mob Winds of Plague. Their latest ‘release’ is a rare treasure – Against The World will leave you horrified, yet somehow gurning with glee, like some toffee-chewing toddler riding the big-boy shit at Thorpe Park.

Winds of Plague Against the World album cover artwork packshot Thrash Hits

Despite the record’s impressive ability to crush your soul with unimaginable boredom, via repeated pressing of the big red mono-paced breakdown button, the constant use of the random meatheaded lyrical cliché generator™, the embarrassingly lazy and derivative guitars and unoriginal synths, it is Johnny’s belligerent shouting over 95% of the above that actually makes Against the World inadvertently hilarious. There are far too many moments of lyrical comedy gold to repeat on these pages, but if ol’ life gets you down now and again I suggest you purchase Against the World immediately.

One day I’m gonna go / Coming back to haunt you as a motherfucking ghost.

From the starting line, the quiff-of-burning-nappy-poo that is ‘One for the Butcher’ immediately encapsulates this dull mess, and from then it’s a race to the finish line before you start punching yourself in the face. A brief respite from the tedium comes courtesy of the Ultimate Warrior, whose near-retarded spoken word interlude ‘The Warrior Code’ will have you pissing yourself like Paula Radcliffe at the side of the road.

Watch Winds of Plague play ‘Refined in the Fire’ live:

How a band can completely regress and release a record that fails on every level is perplexing. Even from a purely objective viewpoint, the record is poorly mixed and I wouldn’t be surprised if these identical-sounding songs and retarded lyrics were cobbled together immediately prior to the band staggering into the recording studio. Avoid like the plague.

0/6

Top Tracks: Erm….
Sounds Like: Bowel Movements.

Winds of Plague – Against the World tracklisting:
Raise the Dead
One for the Butcher
Drop the Match
Built for War
Refined in the Fire
The Warrior Code
Against the World
Monsters
Most Hated
Only Song We’re Allowed to Play in Church Venues
California
Strength to Dominate

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