While being a member of progressive collective, The Ocean, is something most musicians would (rightly) envy, their unique brand of European post-metal arguably isn’t the best music for blowing off excess aggression too. We guess that’s why Jona Nida, Louis Jucker and Luc Hess from the band formed their new side-project. Coilguns. It’d certainly explain why Jona Nido was talking porn before the end of the second question of our Christmas interrogation, and had moved on to donkey-molestation by our eighth. 

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What is your favourite Christmas song?
‘Rape Me’ by Nirvana. It reminds me of my childhood.

What is your favourite Christmas movie?
I don’t know about the rest of Europe, but in French speaking countries they play a lot of Asterix & Obélix. My favourite being ‘Les 12 travaux d’Astérix’. Otherwise I’d go for any Rocco Siffredi or Sasha Grey’s christmas porn scene.

What is the most metal Christmas present you’ve either given or received?
Probably when my Grandma made me that half-a-meter steak-sandwich a few years back. She even wrapped it up in giftpaper and put it under the tree. Not to mention that she’s 94 and she’s still metal somehow.

What is your best memory of 2011?
Definately the first european tour of Coilguns – “The Mastoid Tour” – and the China tour we did with The Ocean right afterwards.

What is your favourite album of 2011?
Thrice – Major/Minor

What will your New Year Resolution be?
Maybe to stop being a touring bum and get a life.

If all those mad prophecies about 2012 being the end of the world comes true, how do you want the apocalypse to manifest itself?
With hookers running naked all over the street, craving for some skinflutes and blow raining from the sky, driving people crazy and then everybody would kill each other with bare hands.

What role would you take in a nativity play?
The sneaky deviant dude that nobody speaks about. And while everybody would be looking at Jesus, I’d be quietly ass-raping the donkey…

2011 has been a year of revolution and upheaval – what do you think will happen in 2012?
What will happen is the release of our new EP, Stadia Rods, on scottish DIY label Dead Dead Dead Music on March 15, and right afterwards a tour together with our friends Earthship all over europe including the UK. So no major upheaval in the music industry but a definite kick in the balls to anyone who will show up to these shows and maybe the end of the world.

Who is the ugliest person you’ve kissed under the mistletoe?
Robin Staps.

What do you think of Lulu?
Not sure I got the whole thing, but if Metallica’s involved then it must be shit.