As it’s International Women’s Day, we thought we’d do something to celebrate. Rather than do some regressive piece about tits, we did a top 6 of the ways heavy metal is rubbish towards women. Can we stop these, please?
Top 6 ways heavy metal treats women really fucking badly
1) The term “female-fronted metal”
Yes, because all bands with women singers sound exactly the fucking same. Cerebral Bore and Kylesa and Nightwish and Darkened Nocturn Slaughtercult are completely the same thing. And because it would be totally acceptable to call Disturbed “Jewish-fronted metal” and Suffocation “black guitaristed death metal”. Wait, what?
2) Assume if you’re not dressed like you’re metal that you’re only there with your boyfriend.
If you see a woman at a metal gig who’s not wearing “the uniform”, chances are some prick is about to ask her if she knows who the band is. Despite the fact she was probably already listening to Dissection while he was still working out how to spell Megadeth probably, and knows more about Devourment than he ever will.
3) “Hottest women in metal” awards/features/specials
SRSLY? In 2013, these still exist? Fuck’s sake…
4) “She’s really good… for a girl”
Yes, clearly a vagina is a crippling inhibition for musical aptitude. You never get really talented musicians without Y-chromosomes. Apart from all of Girlschool. And Grace Perry, formerly of Landmine Marathon. And Leah from Aliases. And Jo from Bolt Thrower. And Jaqueline du Pré. And Maria Callas. And Diamanda Galás. And Tori Amos. And fucking millions of others. Meanwhile, male musicians include Jared Leto, Chris Barnes, Justin Bieber, and the members of Keane and Venom.
Grace Perry singing in Landmine Marathon. Brutal.
If some random guy pinched your arse hard enough to leave a bruise or slipped his hand down your jeans to squeeze your balls too hard while you were watching Slayer, you’d probably punch him, irrespective of your sexual orientation. Yet every metal-loving woman will tell a hundred stories about being poked, prodded, fondled and generally harassed in all sorts of shitty ways.
6) Hot girl in band gets asked to do ALL the interviews
“Oh, there’s a girl in the band? Can we talk to her? We don’t care that she’s incredibly talented, or that the band are a team of creative minds, or that the guy in the band give much better quotes, we just want to talk to the one who the virginal teenage boys will fancy.” Oh brother…