We’re pretty sure that “hot-shot shred guitarist and competitive bodybuilder”, Maxxxwell Carlisle, is actually probably too metal for us to feature him on Thrash Hits. His first name has three Xs in it! His own personal logo (yes, he has one) looks like it could cut our dicks off. We’re scared.
From: Los Angeles, USA
Actually from: The gym
LOL factor: 4/6 – because he could probably crush our skulls with his biceps
Maxxxwell Carlisle is a self-described “hot-shot shred guitarist and competitive bodybuilder”. In many of the photos of Maxxxxxxwell that we found, he was holding his guitar like a literal axe. In many of the other photos of Maxxxxxxxxwell, he’s making sure his arms get as much prominence as his guitar.
Then there’s Maxxxxxxxxwell’s logo. BLOODY LOOK AT IT. If we weren’t afraid that Maxxxxxxxxwell might get on a plane and come over and murder us with his monstrous guns, we’d say he’s overcompensating for something by having a logo that’s so preposterously OTT (please don’t hunt us down, Maxxxxxxxxwell).
If you are desperate to find out more about the achievements of Maxxxwell Carlisle, check out his Wikipedia page (which sadly does not contain any photos).